Incorporated into these values is what Tevye the Milkman, the main character in "Fiddler on the Roof," summarized in one word — Tradition!
Generations ago, when the Jewish customs and traditions surrounding death and grieving were formulated, hospitals, extended care homes, hospices and other similar institutions where death was commonplace did not exist. Rather, people died in their homes, frequently the same homes in which they were born.
In our history, perhaps the biggest change we observed between the 1940s and 1980s was the acceptance of dying at home— it was practically unheard of. If death did occur at home, the deceased was often taken to the hospital where a physician would "pronounce" the person dead.
In calendar year 1996, almost 60 percent of the funerals arranged by The Ira Kaufman Chapel had first contact with the families in the home where the loved one had died. When dying and death occurs at home, we are comforted with the same methods of spiritual guidance and awareness that our ancestors practiced throughout our history.
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KADDISH
While the burial Kaddish acknowledges death, most versions of this prayer do not even mention the word. Kaddish is concerned with life in the world and asks that God's name be sanctified among the living.
The Kaddish invokes a world of holiness and peace while reminding us of one of the central obligations of Jewish life: Tikkun Olam, healing the world. Tikkun Olam calls for making the world so holy, there is no gap between our world and the world in which tikkun (healing) is realized. The Kaddish also reminds us of our obligation to continue the tasks of living, extending the values of those who have died and the obligation of Jews to choose life.
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YAHRZEIT REMINDERS
The Ira Kaufman Chapel sends over 55,000 yahrzeit notices throughout the country and around the world. With constant changing of addresses, zip codes, area codes and phone numbers, it is a challenge to keep our mailing list as current as possible. To ensure we are sending you accurate yahrzeit notices on a timely basis, please supply us with the following information:
- Name of Deceased
- Hebrew Date of Death (if you know this) English Date of Death (and time)
- Name of Person to Receive Yahrzeit Notice
- Name of Deceased's Spouse (if applicable)
- Your Full Mailing Address, City, State, Zip Code
- Your Phone Number including Area Code
Upon receipt of this information, it will be entered into our computer records. You should receive your notices four weeks prior to the date of yahrzeit. Please remember to keep us informed of any changes to your address so that you can continue to receive these yahrzeit notices without delay.
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CHEVRA KADISHA (Holy Society)
In ancient days, when a death occurred, the family immediately contacted the Chevra Kadisha (Holy Society), so named from the root words "Chaver" which means friend and "Kadish" which means holy.
Chevra Kadisha is a holy society or holy group of friends that prepares a body for burial, according to traditional Jewish practice.
The true meaning of mitzvot is found in the motives behind the acts of kindness performed by members of the Chevra Kadisha. Doing kind deeds for someone who has just died is done with the knowledge that your kindness can not be repaid by that person. Rather, this has long been regarded as the ultimate act of unselfishness, for other than performing a kind deed, there can be no ulterior motive.
One of the most meaningful tasks performed by the Chevra Kadisha is the religious ritual of Taharah (purification). The taharah is usually done the morning of the funeral and can best be described as a ritual bath. Taharahs are performed for men by men and for women by women.
Following the recitation of the prayers required for taharah is a 2000-year-old tradition of burial in Takhrikhin (shrouds), preceding the placement of the deceased in the casket.
This tradition originated in the First Century when Rabbi Gamaliel asked that he be buried in a very simple garment, stating that he came into this world like everyone else and he should return to God in the same way.
Rabbi Gamaliel's act of unselfishness brought true democracy to Jewish tradition and death. Wealthy or not, all are created equal before God and that which determines their reward is not what they can afford to wear on the outside, but the person they are on the inside.
Ecclesiastes stated "As he came, so shall he go." Just as a newborn child is immediately washed and enters this world clean and pure, so shall a person who departs this world be cleansed and made pure.
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ERETZ YISROEL (Land of Israel)
As a further symbol of our oneness with God; our oneness with Israel, the Chevra Kadisha places Eretz Yisroel, ground soil from Israel, into the casket. It does not mean the person will be buried in Israel, rather that their body will always be in contact with soil from the Holy Land.
Many families will bring soil or Jerusalem stones home from a visit to Israel. Whether we supply the family or they bring the bag of soil home from their visit to Israel, many families are touched by the gesture — connecting them to their Judaic roots and to the Holy Land.
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For more information, contact Herbert or David.
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